i don't kno...

i don't know what to do tonight.... i am too lazy to pick up my phone and call anyone, not to mention i don't like calling people in general anyway.i went out last night, went to 2 clubs, both clubs were eh. but some guy who was okay looking wants to take me out to ice cream tomorrow. i doubt that will happen, i just find his laugh a little unnerving.... i thought i gave him a fake number, but i was too high and drunk to think clearly so it seems i gave him a real number, as he called me already today, early. this new trend with men calling the day after they meet you, in the MORNING especially, is starting to creep me out. whatever happened to games, plains, and automobiles?games make you tougher, even if they suck at times. they make you tough, baby. gotta kick your own ass or no one else will.but i have to admit being told you are beautiful is always nice. some model scout spotted me in the club, gave me 2 invitation cards to a modeling event which promotes models. it is supposed to be held next friday, plus 2 more fridays over the next 2 months. i know all this is bullshit anyway, just a bunch of lingo and lines to get people to "think" they are models when indeed they are probably just bimbos paying to be models, but the fact that i got these 2 invites and not all the other girls did gives me an ego boost, i hate to admit. but why not go? maybe i can pretend to be a model too. but if i have to pay money to pretend to be a model, i will decline. no thanks. i am broke, if i am on the runway, i get paid. i used to model when i was a kid, for children's furniture ads and for other photo shoots for this professional photographer in boston. and i got paid. now that's hot.so what?i wish a beauty queen would be my slave.