i walk into you

i am spacy, sassy.... want new shoes, wanting it alli have absolutely no love interests.... and tis' good.i love it this way. i live for this shit. no worries, no fears, no cares.

her name

i don't like you.

not tired

still up, my roommate is still sleeping, but was on the phone with her ex, pacing the apartment for an hour, i don't care really but i do know one thing and that is do NOT keep in touch with ex-es. never. that leads to utter and complete sorrowful hell. i don't keep in touch with any ex-es except for david. and the only reason i keep in touch with david is because i have known him for 10 years, he saw me go through adolescence, i mean, shhhiiiiit. my roommate needs to cut the fucker lose. let him find someone else to sadistically embrace and ultimately confuse. i hate boyfriends. they ruin your social life. and my happiness comes first, he ha.i visited my close friend amy tonight. our visits are so....i can hear my roommate peeing, not what i'd rather hear right now. she is still in the bathroom ten minutes later, is she dead? i hope not. nah, she is probably shitting. sexy. i hate the sun. i want beauty, i want to overwhelm.

wireless network connection is fickle.....!

my wirleless connection is not being very consistent so the only place i can operate online right now in my entire apartment is in my bathroom, on the tiolet. i cannot even move anywhere or it won't work, have to use it on my toilet. very odd. can't go to my room cuz it don't want to work there, my roommate is already sleeping so i can't, like normal people, use my own living room since she is ALL OVER the couch, so here i am, on my toilet. and i don't even have to use the bathroom. and i could be out right now, at a bar with work people, if only i had 3 dollars times ten.i feel so bad.... ever since this co-worker had a seizure, every time i go to work i snap at at least one person. i am pms-ing, though, and i am going through some real shit right now (money problems, new york city problems, friends being assholes, roommate being a cunt, grandma gone) so i have my reasons, but it's still no excuse. i need to lighten up. but i hate being a hostess. i am trying to find a new job where i won't have to feel defensive every time a manager walks by, but i need an art job, not a restaurant job where i fold fucking chopsticks. fuck, i hate this job so much i am getting pissed off just thinking about it!!!!!!i want to move out of this city right now. if i had two thousand bucks, i would literally leave this second. i really just hate how redundant things are. and the folding of the chopsticks is the perfect anecdote here.the funny thing is i really don't care, i have lost almost all my compassion. ha ha, not really. it must be the book i am reading. or the pms.kiss me, even though i'm not irish.